I recently heard the chaplain for the United States Congress speaking at a church about relationships. He made this comment (and I’m paraphrasing), “It doesn’t matter if I know someone intimately, it doesn’t matter if I understand their wounds and hurt with them, it doesn’t matter if I know, appreciate and enter into their likes and dislikes. All of that doesn’t matter . . . unless I want to know them and love them like God knows them and loves them.”
That is a powerful statement. I have realized that I don’t want to know and to love others like God does. I want to know and love others in a way that enhances my reputation and also makes me comfortable. If there is something in it for me then that is a bonus.
Something though to consider is some people don’t want to be known. I had a guy in a small group I attended, when confronted with the idea of sharing at a deeper level, got squirmish and made the statement that small group wasn’t the place for that. If that is so, then where is the place for soul transformation? Boundaries are necessary in relationships. There are people who don’t know any other way to be in relationship than to be hurtful. John Maxwell stated, “Hurting people hurt people.”
It’s unfortunate that those who know God through Jesus seem to be the worst at healthy relationships. And those who do not know God through Jesus seem to crave, long, and search for those types of intimate relationships. I think right now I’d rather get to know worldly friends than plastic religious friends.
